A Season of Goodbyes

Even when it’s scrawled on the calendar and planned for months, saying goodbye–even in the best of circumstances–is difficult. We’ve had two major goodbyes in the past two weeks and both were hard for vastly different reasons.

At the end of May, we said goodbye to our little girl. Well, she wasn’t so little anymore but she’s still our beautiful, cherished daughter. Although we entrusted her to a wonderful, godly young man and couldn’t be happier for the both of them, we still miss her morning hugs, her sense of humor, and a thousand other things that have flitted away with her daily presence in our home.

Such happy goodbyes are not easy. And in the flurry of activity leading up to the Big Day (which, obviously, did not include my keeping up with this blog), I treasured those hugs and took little mental pictures of my daughter being involved in the everyday landscape of life.

The Sunday before her wedding, we learned that my father-in-law went into the hospital. So, instead of heading to Texas and to take part in the ceremony, this sweet man was in and out of ICU, his wife by his side. Our daughter was able to call her papaw and speak to him before her wedding, but, sadly, he passed away while she was on her honeymoon.

At age 91, I suppose a goodbye is to somewhat be expected. Much like a date on the calendar, you know it’s coming in the semi-near future. But Dad has been relatively healthy, and he has always been such a fixture and rock in our family, it just doesn’t seem possible that he is no longer with us. Thankfully, he is with Jesus and so this goodbye won’t last forever.

In the midst of these two weighty, bittersweet goodbyes there was a series of smaller ones too. Friends from out of town came to the wedding and returned home. Family we haven’t seen in years came to the funeral and left. The atmosphere of our home went from the wedding blustered busyness of a bride-to-be to an empty nest of quiet reflection.

It is all good. It is all beautiful. And it is all so final.

In the midst of all of this, we also had a birth! My niece had her second baby two days before Dad’s funeral. She loved her papaw fiercely and was determined to get out of the hospital as soon as possible. Both were present for Dad’s ceremony ❤︎

My father-in-law was a great man. To recognize him, I leave you with his obituary. It includes a sweet, fitting tribute from my oldest daughter who took my heart through a round of bittersweet goodbyes when she was married nearly seven years ago. At the time, she honored her papaw by having him escort her down the long pathway to where her father waited to walk her down the aisle. Having no daughters of his own, this was a sweet, tearful moment indeed!

It is with heavy but hopeful hearts that the family of James Richard FitzGerald, age 91, of Pearl, MS, announces his passing. James went to be with the Lord at UMMC on June 4, 2019. He was born in Salem, MA on March 14,1928 to Anna and James E. FitzGerald. He attended Essex Agricultural High School.

James married Gaye Pogue of Jackson, MS on September 5, 1959. He was a proud member and usher at New Life Christian Fellowship. He also served as the Post Commander of VFW 2359 in Danvers, MA from 1963-1964.

His eldest granddaughter fittingly summed up His life with this tribute:

“‘Well done, good & faithful servant!’
Words I know my Papaw heard, Tuesday morning, as he passed into glory.
He was a man of dignity, a man who did what was right no matter what. He never spoke ill of anyone, no matter what had happened between them. He become head of his family at 16, stepping into a role of responsibility and duty, having to quit the agricultrual school he so dearly enjoyed. He served our nation as a Marine and fought in the Korean War. He worked two jobs and raised a fine family.

Family has always been at the core of who this man was. The simple things in life were his riches. The smell of fresh wood shavings, cigar smoke, and coffee will forever be the smell of my Papaw. At the age of 91, his mind and his memory were infallible. A storyteller and a lover of history, we spent many hours talking both of family history and historical events–the Civil War being a favorite for us both. A fine meal prepared at home out-shined any store bought feast, in his opinion. He lived a life full of challenges, but let none of them define him. He found the positive where any other person would only find despair. He was gratitude personified.” MB

James is survived by His wife Judith Gaye FitzGerald, and his three sons: James A. FitzGerald (Amanda) of Florence, MS , William Joseph FitzGerald (Heather) of Azle, TX, and Paul Thomas FitzGerald (Pam) of Hattiesburg, MS. He will be lovingly remembered by his eleven grandchildren: Tyler FitzGerald, Cameron FitzGerald, Conner FitzGerald, Mckenzie Brown, Garrett FitzGerald, Delaney Dipnarinesingh, Olivia FitzGerald, Brady FitzGerald, Sommer FitzGerald, Abigail Thornton, and Daniel FitzGerald. He also greatly enjoyed his seven great grandchildren. James is also survived by siblings, Loraine Krisko of Exeter, NH, Carole Carter of Bolivia, NC, and Leonard FitzGerald of Greenland, NH.

James was preceded in death by his parents, Anna Powers FitzGerald and James E. FitzGerald of Salem MA, brothers Robert FitzGerald and Edward FitzGerald of MA, and sister Dorothy Hirka of Frederick MD.